The 19 Funniest Neil Gaiman Tweets Of All Time

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Neil Gaiman wins Twitter.

1. On being the best:

2. On Tumblr:

3. On the break of day:

4. On his dog:

5. On Occupy Wall Street:

6. On Earth’s birthday:

HAPPY 6015th BIRTHDAY, EARTH! Also, you’re a Libra.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

7. On Coraline:

He did WHAT? RT @impossible_who: OMG I had no idea that @neilhimself wrote coraline!😮

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

8. On The Dark Knight Rises:

The Dark Knight Rises was remarkable. Oscar nomworthy. I was impressed. Also things went boom and there was hitting.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

9. On interpreting signs:

Do Not Tickle The Ooze sign.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

10. On Friday the 13th:

It’s Friday the 13th! Time to head into the woods and stay in dark cabins and lose our virginity then die by the blade or the chainsaw.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

11. On what his Australian obituary would be:

Although his beard looked like someone had glued it on & his hair would have been unconvincing as a wig, he married a rockstar #MyOzObituary

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

12. On editors:

Only because we ate the ones who displeased us. RT @rbp77: because inside every writer, there is a sub-editor.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

13. On the Philippines:

#itsmorefuninthephilippines hashtag is a true one. They applaud loudly and hug you a lot.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

14. On having his life together:

To anyone who thinks “that Neil Gaiman, he is a smart person who has his life together”, I seem to have left my MacAir charger on a plane.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

15. On Walmart:

I have been to WalMart at midnight, & returned with a rawhide bone. I have been to Walmart at midnight, & you should not go there alone.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

16. On people in the universe:

Good night universe. Tomorrow I shall do my best to love everybody in you, unless they are trying to kill me with guns, bombs or tentacles.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

17. On being clumsy:

If you’re especially brilliant and not at all clumsy you can spray handsoap over your jacket moments before appearing on Swedish television.

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

18. On his break from Twitter:

Two more days and my Twitter Holiday is over. This tweet did or didn’t happen. #SchroedingersTweet

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

19. And on what he thinks of himself:

I think he should write faster. And get a haircut. RT @pottertardis: @neilhimself what do you think about neil gaiman

— neilhimself (@Neil Gaiman)

Universal Pictures

Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/jarrylee/neil-gaiman-wins-twitter

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